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Why We’re Typing

squareHow to describe this website… Chiseled? Hirsute? Soothing yet sexual? I suppose this is where we are supposed to outline some tenets of our belief system. Some sort of half-assed blog philosophy to define our position on arbitrary hot-button issues of the day and allow people to know beforehand whether our musings are tailored to your stone-set tastes. So here we go:

Fuck that. If you’re looking for some set of rules to our game here, you won’t find shit. There is no credo, no party line, no rubric. Inflexible rules are the kickstand of the idiotic. Fuck a belief system. In the grand tradition of great thinkers from Friedrich Nietzsche to Adam Carolla we don’t have rules, but we do have thoughts. On the surface, we are pretty standard guys. White, middle-class, suburban, mid-twenties motherfuckers. We’re supposed to be the national average. The center of the demographics. So, why does it feel like we are constantly taking potshots from left field? Like 98% of society couldn’t catch logic if it was fucking his girlfriend on his forehead? The court of public opinion: the queefdom of balless mediocrity. Fuck perception, fuck political correctness, fuck hardliners as a staff a record label and as a motherfuckin’ crew. These rants and tirades are our judgments. This is where we just say whatever the hell we’re thinking.  Where stoic logic meets primal rage.

So why are we typing? We’re probably just bored. Could be some misguided cry for attention. Maybe it’s just a chance to use our poonfingers for something other than your mother’s satisfaction. But it’s really pretty simple. We hear things that piss us off. We do things that we don’t even understand at first. And we encounter a lot of assclowns. We tend to analyze and yell about such things. This way, we can pretend someone is listening.

It’s a simple plan. An outlet for our pent up aggression. A place people can read thoughts based on logic and honesty instead of self-aggrandizing pussydom. So to speak. So, have some laughs and stay awhile. Or get offended and go fuck yourself.